Got A Call

Another day and.. well.. you guessed it, "it's" still in the same place!

I spoke to one of the people who gave me the gem, we shall call him Mort, to keep his identity a secret.  Don't get me wrong, I adore Mort and do not blame him solely for the colorful gift.  You see Mort is married to a woman who is NOT my mother,  To hide her identity we shall call her ...ummmm.. Carol.  Now, I am no fool and do not believe that Carol has any deep feelings for me, in fact I am very aware that there is a simmering dislike between the two of us, we are polite when it is demanded but she in her own way lets me know her feelings.  The way in which she does this is in her gift giving abilities!  Ok, so abilities is a strong word.. I will say her gift giving inabilities.   This is evident by the past several gifts in which she has picked out for me, "it" being the last in a line of .. well.. YIKES type goodies!  Anywhooo I digress, back to Mort.. when we spoke he asked how I liked the gift as it was from Vegas.  Of course I lied and said it was wonderful, I mean I just can not hurt Morts feelings but did suggest VERY strongly that he NOT get me anymore gifts..:)

I think I will compile a top 101 list of things to do with "it".  Add your ideas people.

Another day has passed and "it" is still hanging on the chair.  I tried to give "it" to a friend, a family member and even my little Miss Weenie.. but NOPE.. "it" is still here..

Maybe I can regift..?

The Arrival

Where do I start...

I suppose the day it arrived should be a good beginning.

I picked it up at the post, anxious as the package felt so soft and squishy.  I was unsure as to what was inside, little did I know it would be life changing.  Not only my life but so many others as well. 

The day finally came when I ripped into the brown wrapped soft surprise, I wanted to make it last but the excitement was far to great!  I pulled aside the wrapper and when did my eyes behold????  The most UGLY scarf I have ever seen, at least I thought it was a scarf.  Many of us have debated, is it a scarf, a table runner??  Or is it a shawl?  I am afraid to put it on as I may be mistaken for Mrs. Osama Bin Laden!  I may be arrested and deported back to Pakistan or I could become a de-tanee at Guantanamo Bay!  The horrors are endless as is the discussion of what exactly the thing is.

The wretched item is still hanging over the kitchen chair.. I am taking suggestions as to what exactly to do with it.